the line from John Keats to Fanny Brawne......

A friend told me John Keats once had such lines, "I almost wish we were butterflies and lived but three summer days - three such days with you I could fill more delight than fifty common years could ever contain." - Letter to Fanny Brawne.

I have to be extremely tough if I want my dream comes true! I can't get involved into any "Love", I love "Love" a lot! Beside love from others (if there is any),  I have to leave all my feeling and regret to  Mr. D behind, even, I got to admit,the real reason I tried hard to expend my possibility for businesses (like the leather shop before, and keep running the lolly shop and online business) is just simply because I really want him to know I have changed, I am not as useless as the Clipse in OZ!  I start all these business without family support! And the "dream comes true" job invited me to go there for a trial, a job (even it's temporary term) all the juniors in HKG 's Art Field dying for.

I know, the Clipse in Mr. D's heart is only a spoiled chic with no skill and always behaves badly, but I am changing...I am changing...

There is no way I can reach him now, and I am sure he has no interest for any news of me now, as he already be with someone else, why do I still care of him? Why? Why? Why?

Why can't I try to open up my heart? Why I have to stop seeing guys after the second dinner dates? what's wrong with me? Mr. D has moved forward, why can't I move forward? What am I waiting?