Three wise monkeys

"see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil"

I should never explore my weakness to the world, but......I know I am lazy! I know I am not going to forget about my past and learn from my past if I don't let my problem explore to the world! I am very good at covering my weakness and act as I am close to normal in font of people.

There are so many times I want to act like the time I  just came back from Australia, went out with friends every weekend, or even during the weekdays, always believe Mr. D would come back inside my heart, never face the fact that...he is already gone. Even his cuz told me he already interested in someone else during our very last conversation! (There was reason I hate his cuz, I did trust him!!! His cuz did broken my heart in somehow! I always believe in him, which was why I told him my true feeling and the story from my part! But I felt like a fool now, and of course, a lesson learn from that , I should never trust any male until I spent a lot of time with him)

I only start this blog for a month, and I have the ideas to close this for more than 20 times! I don't want to face the fact! I don't want to let go of the past in somehow.I just want to stand still...I don't want to face the fact that he is not going to seek for me this time! I don't want to admit I still unable to face the fact!

Maybe....this blog is a good thing! A thing that maybe ...in case any of my friends saw this, they will yell at me. I read an article about "To write about feeling is better than to talk about it"for few months ago, I do feel this! All the endless chats with friends and family didn't really calm myself down, but whenever I wrote a blog, I know I need to think twice before I type in any word! As..there are chances for anyone to read this! This made me to think, and to calm down in somehow!

and......my real reason to write in English is ...... only people who care about me a lot will read thought my bad English! (no matter if English is their first language or not)

I won't keep this blog for long! only one year! In 2012, I will face the fact that Mr. D is totally gone!!!!!! As the same time, I will be a better woman~I have to push myself to improve!!!!!!

Then, I will hide my weaknesses!  There will be no need to explore my feeling to the world!

"see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil"will be Clipse in 2012 : )